I got a last-minute show playing at Witzend Live with the GreenRoots and 4MamaEarth at their “Soundlab” event. I love seeing my girl, Angelique at these events. She’s so great at making everyone feel so incredibly loved at her events… even if I complain about LA all the time… 😀 I thought it was gonna be a time of traffic going to LA but it turns out, everybody is going to San Diego for the three day weekend, so I got there about 2 hours early.
I chilled at a Starbucks and read some of the book, “Bound for Glory” by Woody Guthrie-which is awesome you’re looking for something. This is definitely a book worth getting. I don’t want to ruin it, but Woody would have been an awesome kid to grow up with.
I showed up at Witzend Live and got to see all the workers there. The energy in the room is always good and I love the food! Jeb has great pride in his place, and it’s the kind of spot I’d love to work at if I was closer.
As the show started, I got a little claustrophobic because the room was packed. I went into the green room to get ready and got to hang out with Melissa Polinar for a little bit. She has one of my favorite voices in the business, and the melodies that she writes in her songs are heavenly.
I thought that my she was going to be playing next, but then Angelique came and got me and said, “Josh, you’re up hurry up… let’s go…. let’s go…. come on hurry up…. let’s go….” and it freaked me out like crazy. I was NOT ready for that. 😛
Everything was a blur. When I got up on stage, I had to play games with my head and try to turn it off… but it didn’t work.
It was a short set, only played four songs. I started with “Just Let Me Love You”, followed by “Alright”, then “Pocket Change”, and “If I had a dollar”.
I got off stage feeling like a failure. Sometimes, I get into my own head and I really have to let that go. I just feel so bad when I know I can do better. Even if my set was fantastic, If the “vibe” isn’t right, I’ll hate my performance. I think that maybe all artists probably feel this way. But I’m the only one willing to blog about it…
I went back to the green room and there were all sorts of crazy players warming up. My friend Andy Allo got up and played an amazing set and I was so jealous of her talent/look. I wish I had that kind of a voice!
I went outside to clear my head and as I was walking out of the club, a couple people stopped me said, “Your set was great.” I was blown back. I guess I have to remember that I might not be at a sing like a gospel singer, or belt like an opera singer, but I can write a good song… and that’s HUGE. Sometimes I just have to look at my strengths and not my weaknesses. I need to look in a mirror and say, “Josh, you can write good songs.” Believe me, and be okay with that. Blaaaaaaah…. self confidence… psh…. 🙂
I was able to shake it off and enjoy the rest by night, but I was definitely ready to go home.
I think what tonight reminded me was that even on my worst night, if people enjoy it, it’s not my worst night. I need to stay out of my head and just enjoy playing. It doesn’t matter of anyone is listening or if everyone’s paying attention- I need to find happiness in simply playing my songs.
Tonight is my last night in my own bed. Tomorrow I’ll be playing in Ventura at Zoey’s with my best friend B Willing and I’m pretty sure that’s going to be one of my favorite shows on this tour. Hope you can make it!